i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
