But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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