One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
