people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Randomize
