they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize