Non-Jews are for practice
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
