I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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