Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
