it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
there's paper in my vomit.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize