jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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