Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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