their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
