Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
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