i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
