Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
