love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
