Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I just blew my weed a kiss
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize