And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
