Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
