i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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