So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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