first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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