Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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