Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I need to align my fucking chakras
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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