If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
