i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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