I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize