so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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