you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
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