i don't like sucking hair
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
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