Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
