let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Ketchup is God's man juice
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Randomize
