so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize