I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
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