And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
