You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
