Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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