so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
