Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
