Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
