So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
