I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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