Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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