I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I AM VODKA MAN
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
