Well douche your snatch and let's go!
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
