I wish I could teleport
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I will pee on everything he values.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
