No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
