how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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