Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Randomize
