nut hugger
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
We need to rekindle our bromance
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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